Fights of the Round Table

The time has come to seek the Holy Grail. King Arthur has declared a great joust, to find the worthiest knights for this quest. But stupid sexy Merlin thinks a drinking contest would be more appropriate.

By the time the tournament ends, these increasingly-inebriated knights will need to come together and choose their champions. Unless too many grudges and prophecies get in the way.

Long Description

The time has come to seek the Holy Grail.

Every knight of the Round Table wants a chance at this dangerous and sacred quest. But Camelot can only afford to spare three knights.

And so, King Arthur has declared a great joust to determine who is the most worthy. One knight will be chosen based on their skill at arms, and another — thanks to the meddling of stupid sexy Merlin — will be chosen by drinking contest. The third knight will be Sir Galahad, because everyone knows that he is the best at everything.

Only, there is truth in wine, and the knights are about to be reminded of a hard truth. Just because the Round Table treats everyone as equals, doesn’t mean they all get along...

Stories of King Arthur’s court tend to be complex and tragic. But they didn't start that way. Some of the first King Arthur stories were basically medieval fanfics by writers who kept insisting that their new OC knight was stronger than anyone else and could beat up all the other knights. This is a "mythology shitpost" game in that same grand tradition, based on some of the more obscure literary parts of Arthuriana.

Fights focuses on some of the less admirable parts of being a knight, but rather than treating these as tragic flaws, it leans into the comedy. These are legendary heroes, but they’re also exactly the sort of guys you don’t want to talk to at a party.

All combat and drinking contests will be resolved by a simple card game.

Genre note: While you’re welcome to make references to Monty Python and the Holy Grail, this is NOT a Monty Python game. Fundamentally, you can assume that the Knights of the Round Table are extremely good at the actual business of being knights — they just struggle with other stuff.

Gender note: All characters are male by default, and written using male pronouns. If you’d prefer to play your character as a different gender/set of pronouns, that can be accomodated, but may involve changing some nametags.